


Anchor

by Jyto



Category: All For The Game - Nora Sakavic
Genre: Hurt/Comfort, I'd Say I'm Sorry but I'm not, Implied/Referenced Abuse, M/M, Renee is mentioned, Scars
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-18
Updated: 2017-01-18
Packaged: 2018-09-18 10:57:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,655
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9381449
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jyto/pseuds/Jyto
Summary: He'd known Jean had scars. Hearing about his injuries and some of the things that went on at the Nest was different than being faced with the proof of it though.He'd thought he was ready, that because he knew they were there it wouldn't be such a shock.Jeremy was wrong.





	

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [perchance](https://archiveofourown.org/works/8240978) by [hulklinging](https://archiveofourown.org/users/hulklinging/pseuds/hulklinging). 



> Basically I read another fic about Jeremy and Jean and it left me with too much on my mind. While I was rambling on about them, I was told I should actually write it out, and here we are. Hopefully I didn't make them too terribly OOC. If I??? missed any tags please let me know??? I'm a bit new to this.

   It was surprising that the alarm wasn't enough to wake Jean today. It was worrisome, too. He knew that Jean oft woke to the slightest of noises. His bed creaking, a door opening or closing in the hall, footsteps that were just a bit too heavy on the floor. He was possibly one of the lightest sleepers Jeremy had knowingly met. He knew Jean rarely slept through those sounds; they could have been a sign that Riko or another Raven was coming to do something to him.

   Jeremy hesitated just enough to consider his options, then steadily makes his way over to Jean's side of the room. He didn't touch him, who knew how Jean would react, but he also didn't say anything immediately. His eyes had already adjusted to the low light in the room, and Jeremy had to stop where he was so that he wouldn't make a sound. He couldn't even breathe.

   Through the night, Jean must have had another nightmare that didn't wake him. He must have tossed and turned in his sleep. Jeremy knew this because Jean's shirt was riding up, and from where he was standing he had a good view of the different scars criss-crossed and littering over the other man's side. He was sure there were more that he still couldn't see.

 

   He'd known Jean had scars. Hearing about his injuries and some of the things that went on at the Nest was different than being faced with the proof of it though.

   He'd thought he was ready, that because he knew they were there it wouldn't be such a shock.  
   Jeremy was wrong.

 

   At first, he was outraged on Jean's behalf. He shouldn't have had to endure that. Then there was a deep sadness that settled in the pit of his stomach. Jean had endured it.  
   "Moreau," he called, as though it would be enough to wake him. "Moreau, get up."

   It took a bit of verbal prodding, but not as much as it might have with other teammates. The backliner looked at Jeremy through bleary eyes and a hand shielded his face from the light of a lamp somewhere on the other side of the room.

   Jean stayed still at first, an instinctive reaction to access his surroundings, but then he slowly started to relax like the Trojan Captain was used to seeing by now.

   He was aware of the way Jeremy was watching him, but it took a few minutes before Jean could even guess as to why Jeremy had that look on his face. It wasn't quite pity, because Jeremy didn't pity people, but there was something raw in it that made Jean uncomfortable. As he shifted to sit up, he realised where the other man was staring at.

   He didn't say anything.

   What could he have said anyway? He was the one who had gotten in trouble. He was the one who had made the master or Riko or the other Ravens angry. Why was Jeremy so surprised? Why did he seem so upset?

   But Jean already knew why. Jeremy _cared_ , and it wasn't something he was used to. Not like this.

   "Jean," he tried, his voice softer than it previously was.

   Jean shook his head, refusing to talk about it, and said, "I forgot to set the alarm."

   Jeremy stood there only a moment longer before he let it go. He nodded his head, as though he understood that Jean didn't want to talk about it, and with heavy feet he went back to his own side of the room. Jean disappeared into the bathroom to dress for the day, but he was only gone a few minutes. He was never apart from Jeremy much longer than that.

   The pair leave the room to start the day together, and they don't speak of Jean's scars again that day. Every now and then, Jean would catch Jeremy's eyes lingering on him, but the striker knew not to push this. Not yet.

 -

   The next time some of Jean's scars made an appearance, Jeremy still wasn't ready. It was a similar situation and Jean still wouldn't say anything first. This time, Jeremy didn't stare so much, but turned his eyes to the ex-Raven's face instead. It was easier, and probably expected, but Jean wasn't prepared to face Jeremy. He averted his eyes and he tried to ignore the way his captain said his name. He tried to ignore that guilty, shameful feeling digging at his insides that told him he should look at Jeremy. He should say something.

   "We're not talking about this," was what he snapped in the end. For a fraction of a second, something that looked like irritation crossed Jeremy's face.

   It took even less time for Jean to reconsider and process the expression as _hurt._ It wasn't his problem to deal with though.

   "You need to talk about it."

   The voice stopped him where he had moved around the other body. He wasn't- He wasn't ready to talk about it. Not even to Renee. Definitely not to Jeremy.

   "No." Even he wasn't sure if that was a refusal to talk or a refusal to needing to talk though.

   Jeremy's jaw clenched before he let out a soft breath. He wanted to help. They both knew it. But — there wasn't anything he could say to make this better.

 -

   It was a few weeks later when one of Jean's nightmares had woken both boys and Jeremy was sitting at the edge of Jean's bed that his scars were finally broached again. Jeremy had seen more of them by that point. From Jean's nightmares or getting more comfortable changing in front of him or any other reason; he knew he still hadn't seen them all, but that was okay. Just as Jean wasn't ready to tell Jeremy all the details of everything that had happened, Jeremy wasn't ready to see all of it.

   As he reached out to trace one of the lines he couldn't currently see because of Jean's clothes, he had to wonder if Jean was talking to anyone about them. His therapist would have been the preferred answer, but Renee would have been good. As long as there was someone. He doubted there was.

   Jean was tense under Jeremy's touch, so he offered his roommate the most comforting smile possible to try reassuring him.

   "Tell me what caused that one."

   Jeremy watched the struggle play out across Jean's face as he tried to decide whether to answer or brush him aside again. He knew he had won even before Jean knew it. When Jean finally started to speak, his answer came in fragments. From what he could tell, the scar he'd traced had come from Riko and a knife. There was a haunted look to Jean's face and his eyes seemed hollow, empty. Jeremy wasn't sure how to help him, but he was never one to let someone struggle alone.

   Fingers slipped between Jean's fingers and startled him into momentary silence. His eyes were wide as he stares down at the support Jeremy was so easily, so readily offering him, like being an anchor to the present was no big deal. Jean swallowed his thanks away, but Jeremy smiled again anyway, as though he somehow understood the unspoken words.

   Jean took a deep breath to steady himself further before he continued. Jeremy didn't even try to interrupt, which made him feel marginally more comfortable with the situation. These weren't things he thought he was able to talk about, but Jeremy stayed patient. He didn't push him to tell him about the other scars, though Jean could tell Jeremy wanted to know. He didn't ask if Jean had told anyone else yet. Maybe he already knew that he hadn't, though Renee was really the only other person who'd gotten close. Renee knew more of the things that had happened at Evermore, but Jeremy was finding out which story connected to which stain Jean was left with.

   They only talked about that one scar. Jean was unable to decide if he felt better or worse for it, but he tried to ignore his mashup of emotions anyway. Jeremy's fingers from his free hand traced the outline again, some uncountable number of times, before he moved away. He didn't ask about the others. He didn't offer harsh words about how Jean deserved it, which Jean was still baffled by, but he didn't suffocate him with comforting words either.

   Jean watched as Jeremy visibly reigned in his emotions. He wasn't sure if he was trying to keep from scaring Jean or if he was holding his tongue from comments he knew Jean wouldn't appreciate.

   "You're safe here," Jeremy finally breathed out. Jean wondered which one of them he was really talking to, but he nodded his head when Jeremy looked at him. Jeremy didn't look impressed with his easy acquiesce. "You're safe, Jean. Repeat it back to me like you believe it."

   It took several repetitions for Jeremy to be satisfied. It was clear he knew Jean didn't fully believe the words. He also knew this was keeping them up. They'd be sluggish through practice in the morning if they didn't sleep soon.

   "Will you be okay?"

   "Yes."

   Jeremy's eyes surveyed Jean's expression for a few extra seconds before he slid off the bed. He moved back to his own easily, but Jeremy didn't instantly fall back asleep. He stayed up until he was sure Jean was sleeping. After hearing Jean's breathing even out, Jeremy finally released a sigh that he'd been holding in for several hours. His eyes fixed on the ceiling.

   Jean wasn't okay. He knew Jean wasn't okay and it would be a long time before he was.

   They were making progress, at least. However slowly, progress was progress.

   Jeremy closed his eyes and hoped with everything he had that Jean would begin to open up more and continue to heal.

  



End file.
